Monday, August 17, 2009


Ladies. Your man doesn't share your enthusiasm for fine wines? Sniffing and swirling and sipping is not his bag? You babble on about tannins and mouth feel and finish while he zones out? Well, you are not alone. I've discovered a foolproof way to enjoy some delicious vino with your gentleman friend. The secret: finagle it in next to some meat. And preferably potatoes. The method is iron clad.

Exhibit A: Husband who doesn't give a shit about wine:

Wife: "Honey, I've got a fabulous bottle of pinot noir to sample tonight! Aren't you excited?"
Husband: "Eh. Er, Okay. Yeah. Wait huh? Sorry I was watching Sportscenter."

Exhibit B: Husband who doesn't give a shit about wine:

Wife: "Honey - your steak and potatoes are ready! Yummmmmy, right? A strong muscular man like you needs his protein....and an amazing athlete like you needs his carbs! By the way I also poured a drink for you."
Husband: "I worship the ground you walk on. I love meat and potatoes and boobs. Wait I meant wine. I love wine!"

See how easy that is! Look what I was able to cultivate in my very own home:

Look closely. Meat? Check. Tates? Check. Pinot Noir? Check? Bacon's eyes on the prize? Check. Mission Accomplished. That wasn't so hard.

In all seriousness, we drank the Uptown Pinot. It was mediocre at best. It was extremely light, and fairly fruity, but not really. It was almost like an under-ripe fruit - harsh, a little sour, and no tannins whatsoever. I mean, it wasn't awful. Even Shawn said "well, it's a nice light summer wine". He said it in a meat coma! I wouldn't recommend it - especially for 16 dollars a bottle. Michael at Vino 100 warned me....with his "mehhhhh, it's fine" reaction to my selection. If it were 7 or 8 bucks, I wouldn't be complaining. But you can do better for your money.

However, bribing your husband with meaty and/or starchy delights? Priceless.

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